Monday, 9 March 2009

Drawing without prejudice

Yesterday I got my crayons out and drew away, probably with my tongue sticking out of my mouth, whilst I was watching the delights of FiveUSA's CSI Sunday. For reasons I don't understand, this always begins with an episode of Numb3rs, which baffles me to the point that I get angry about its existence. Either way, the results are there for all to see, click the thumbnail for (wallpaper-sized, in fact) full splendour.

Anyway, the importance of such absent-minded drawing without purpose came flooding back to me yesterday evening. Just look at the progress I made! No, honestly, that page there contains at least one revolutionary concept, as well as a particularly neat trench coat-wearing gent. I walloped him out in a minute or so, thanks to CSI, Hank Williams' I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry and a lurking hitchhiker going round murdering people.

I'm not going to tell you the precise thing which has revolutionised drawing for me. Principally because I think it's pretty obvious on the page, but also because spies are probably lurking, waiting to steal my ideas.

If this hasn't put you off art forever, I still have two pictures for sale. I also hope to have some new stuff up soon. There's a link to the relevant post in my sidebar for all you collectors out there.

Sunday, 8 March 2009

Yes, that's the sensible thing to do

This blog post will, I hope, serve to help me remember that the leader of the Liberal Democrats is called Nick Clegg. It has definitely reminded me that, before I saw his picture in this article, I had never seen what he looked like before.

A few points:
  1. I salute the faultless logic at play here. What this country needs to get itself out of it's worst self-imposed financial crisis in nearly 80 years is definitely political leadership from a party who've never been in power in their current guise, and who last held the top office in Britain in any form on 16th October 1922. I love this plan. I'm excited to be a part of it.
  2. Scholars of language will notice my choice of words in the first paragraph. Article, rather than "news story". It's another piece of non-news. At least let the man give the speech before you report on it, for heaven's sake.
  3. The leader of the Liberal Democrats is called Nick Clegg. Nick Clegg Nick Clegg.
  4. I don't understand economics at all. This week I have, part by accident and part by design, watched a lot of documentaries about Margaret Thatcher. Her key political legacy to the UK - whether you think it's good or bad, pinkos - was, at its core, an economic one. Her free market political thinking was intellectually justified, indeed, by the writings of the economist Friedrich von Hayek. Even in spite of this continual assault of Thatcher on my brain, I still have no idea about economics. My idea to solve the economic problems is for everyone to stop being so silly.
  5. Thatcher crushing the unions was a good thing, no matter what grubby pinkos will tell you otherwise. Especially the sort of Newsnight Review grubby pinko who have never even seen a lump of coal in their life, because they used to get their butlers to deal with it.
That ought to do it.

P.S. the sixth point may well be that sometimes I like to make deliberately controversial statements in the fifth point of a five-point list for no other reason but to get a rise out of people and in so doing amuse myself. Who knows?

Wednesday, 4 March 2009

Personal failings writ large

Hello. In his description of this blog on his site's link page, internet legend twohundredpercent describes this blog as "likely to be updated five times a day for a week and then not at all for two months". This is as accurate an assessment of anything that you will ever encounter. However, in the spirit of trying to break the vicious (yet sexy) cycle, I have decided to do a blog post about all the blog posts I keep meaning to do. This will serve to at least cruelly mock you with an indication of what you're missing, but at most give me a kick up the bot-bot.
  • My favourite twenty Bob Dylan songs. I have already worked out what they are.
  • My favourite albums which are 30 minutes long or less. I have not yet worked these out.
  • Stylistic cock and balls drawing 101. In this exceptional post, I plan to assess five different hastily drawn cocks which we drew in my book the other week in the pub, on the basis of their artistic and social merit.
  • Formula 1 season 2009 preview, which I should probably do on my motor racing-only blog if I can only remember where the hell it is. Equally, however, it's arguable that I don't have sufficient material for one blog, let alone several and so I should just CONSOLODATE.
  • A biography of internet celebrity Sir Sand Goblin. I just this second thought that up, but it seems to have promise.
  • Reasons I hate people complaining that I never update my blog, especially (as is usually the case) seeing as they either don't have one themselves or do but never update it. And complaining about it being substandard when I do. What am I, Proust?
Well. There's something to look forward to, eh?

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