I'm a very cuddly sort of person in appearance and, if you'll indulge me, in my lovely curmudgeonly teddy bear personality. However, I am sometimes - too often - a bit of a wet fish when it comes to being tactile. And I'm mad as hell and not going to take it any more. That's right. Angry cuddles for everyone. Form a queue.
No, but I frequently feel myself holding back. It's by no means at all times and in all places, and again, it is undeniably also a good thing sometimes. But I do need perhaps to start crediting myself with a little more ability to read a situation than I currently am. If you're surrounded by loved ones, it's a social occasion, everyone is having fun... well, you know, people are not that likely to get the pepper spray out. Initially, at least.
Maybe it's a bit of the old English reserve. But I suspect it's much more likely to be those tiresome self-esteem issues again. And I'm sick and tired of them ruining everything. 31 years of running my life on the assumption I'm awful and everyone would be happier if I went a long, long way away is probably sufficient for any lifetime.
So, my new ambition is to be more cuddly, in all wuggly ways and at all huggle-appropriate times. I promise not to stick a thumb up anyone's arse.
Initially, at least.
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